It really isn’t. Working up to wearing a butt plug for an extended period is a process, not a starting point.
The US Is Obsessed With Butt Plugs, Says New Data — Here’s Why You Should Be, Too
For those of you who are unfamiliar, butt plugs are pretty much THE sex accessory of anal play. And while some people may shy away from them out of fear of judgement or the unknown, this type of sex toy can elicit an incredible amount of pleasure when used correctly.
In other words, don’t let the stigma of butt plugs — and, let’s be honest, anal sex in general — keep you away from exploring sensations outside of your genitals if that’s what you want to do. Not only have 36 percent of women tried anal sex at least once in their life, but people in the United States buy more butt plugs than any other country, according to data collected by sex-toy retailer Lovehoney. If you’re curious and want to learn more, you’ve come to the right place.
What Is a Butt Plug?
A butt plug is a sex toy designed for internal anal masturbation or anal sex. Though they come in various sizes — some can be as small as a pinky finger, others can be as wide as a fist — they all have a flared base. (All anal sex toys should have a flared base, since this prevents the toy from getting lost in the anal cavity.)
Butt plugs are also an extremely gender-neutral sex toy meant for all bodies to enjoy, regardless of someone’s sexual orientation or preferences. And while not everyone may enjoy anal stimulation, “most everyone has the physical capacity for pleasure” with a butt plug, says clinical sexologist Sarah Melancon, PhD.
Purpose of a Butt Plug
Butt plugs are a type of sex toy used for anal stimulation, and Dr. Melancon says the purpose of using a butt plug has a lot to do with the fact that it just feels really good. “Butt plugs can help create a stretching, opening, and/or full sensation that many find pleasurable,” she says. This is especially true for those who have a prostate, since “the prostate can be most directly stimulated through the anus.”
Butt plugs can also be used in a variety of different ways, both by yourself and with a partner. Some people may enjoy just using a butt plug, while others may enjoy combining the stimulation from a butt plug with simultaneous genital masturbation or vaginal intercourse. It really depends on your preferences.
Lastly, it’s also common for people to use butt plugs in BDSM play or to fulfill a fantasy — like, say, if you wanted to wear a butt plug in public with no one but your partner knowing.
How to Prepare For a Butt Plug
I know what you’re thinking: “Um, what about poop?” And yes, poop naturally comes with the territory of any sort of anal play. But if you’re worried about it, feel free to invest in an enema beforehand (which rinses the area inside the rectum) in order to flush out any fecal matter. You can also plan on playing a few hours after a bowel movement, which can help “reduce the risk,” says Dr. Melancon. But ultimately, even if you don’t do any sort of prep work, there may not be any poop hanging out in your rectum anyway (since it’s usually stored higher up, in the colon).
You should also plan on having plenty of lube on hand since the anus is not self-lubricating, Dr. Melancon says. Just make sure that if you’re using silicone lube, you’re not using a butt plug (or any other sex toy) made of silicone, since silicone can break down the sex-toy material. If your butt plug or sex toy of choice is made of silicone, opt for a water-based lube instead.
Lastly, check in with yourself before beginning. Dr. Melancon recommends asking yourself, “Do I have any fears, worries, or concerns?” And if so, consider why you feel that way. If you have a partner, share these thoughts with them to get to the root of the problem. Remember, if the thought of using a butt plug is not a “F*ck yes,” consider it to be a “F*ck no.”
How to Use a Butt Plug
Dr. Melancon says you should start by essentially turning yourself on. “Begin with external anal stimulation to warm up the area and increase blood flow.” You can do this by putting lube on your finger and massaging it in and around the anus, using a vibrator wherever it feels good on your body, or by touching yourself in whatever way that feels good.
Once you feel stimulated, you can start slowly inserting the butt plug with lots, and lots, and lots of lube. “I highly recommend gently pushing the anus out as you insert, to make more room and insertion easier. (Think about how the anus works when you poop — this is basically the opposite motion!)” says Dr. Melancon.
You might feel a lot of pressure with the butt-plug insertion, and if this is the case, Dr. Melancon recommends simultaneously stimulating your genitals using your hands or other toys. This will not only work as a pleasurable distraction of sorts, but it will keep you feeling turned on.
Then, as the butt plug is partially inserted, squeeze the anus with the toy inside, as this can “help the anal sphincters relax and open,” says Dr. Melancon. Once it is fully inserted, enjoy the pleasure and “fullness” you may feel.
Just note that in order to feel pleasure, you don’t have to insert the butt plug entirely. Go at your own pace, enjoy what feels good, and let the pleasure direct you. If at any time you’re feeling pain or discomfort, “focus on your breathing, which may help you relax and sense what your body needs next.”
As a general safety precaution, too, know that butt plugs should stay reserved for your booty — unless washed and rinsed thoroughly. While it’s OK to move sex toys from vaginal stimulation to anal stimulation, it’s not advised to move toys and fingers from the anus to the vagina, since doing so could cause a bacterial infection.
What Should You Consider When Buying a Butt Plug?
Make sure the butt plug has a flared base. “Anything going into the anus must have a flared base,” says Dr. Melancon. This is because toys without flared bases can become unretrievable in your anal cavity.
Start small. Don’t be afraid to start with some smaller plug options, get used to the sensations, and then upgrade to larger sizes once you decide you enjoy the sensation.
Opt for body-safe materials. This includes medical-grade silicone, hard plastic, stainless steel, borosilicate glass, and ceramic, which will be noted in the description of the sex toy online or on the box. “Avoid any toys that are made of a jelly-like material, porous materials, contain phthalates, or smell strange,” advises Dr. Melancon. It’s also best to buy a butt plug instead of making a homemade one or trying to DIY it yourself.
For beginner use, you can try this butt-plug set made of silicone, as “buying a set ranging from small to large will give you various options to explore.” For some other pretty butt-plug recommendations, you can also browse here.
You Shouldn’t Wear a Butt Plug All Day — But If You Do, Read This
It’s not surprising that you’d want to enjoy that frisky feeling all day long. It certainly could make the day-to-day a lot more fun, amirite?
But before you attempt to wear a butt plug for an extended period, there are some things you need to know.
It really isn’t. Working up to wearing a butt plug for an extended period is a process, not a starting point.
It takes some training — as in anal training — to stretch your anus so it can comfortably and safely accommodate the size and movement of your butt plug.
Even with ample prep, experts like Dr. Evan Goldstein, founder and CEO of Bespoke Surgical and co-founder of Future Method, don’t recommend wearing butt plugs for that long.
“Contrary to what the name suggests, people shouldn’t be wearing butt plugs for any extended amount of time, especially all day or overnight,” says Goldstein.
Most experts and sex toy makers advise against wearing a butt plug for more than 30 minutes at a time.
Not only is that ample time to enjoy a butt plug’s many pleasure-boosting effects, but it’s also a matter of safety.
“The best use of butt plugs is to dilate the anal sphincters and get the skin and muscles ready to engage in anal play, says Goldstein. “Keeping those muscles and skin fully gaped is actually the key to preparing for bottoming (receiving).”
He continues: “I get why people like wearing them for extended periods of time — they can create positive prostate stimulation and some people simply love the feeling of fullness. But it’s important to understand there are serious negative ramifications when used improperly.”
Don’t let the shape fool you, keeping a butt plug in could set you up for some painful side effects and lasting complications.
“Nearly all butt plugs are designed with a “neck” — a piece between the shaft and the base — that’s noticeably thinner in diameter,” says Goldstein. “This is to help keep the butt plug from slipping out.”
“However, when someone wears a butt plug for long periods of time, the sphincter can get inflamed around the plug, making removal very difficult, if not impossible,” he says. “Additionally, the surrounding anal and rectal tissues may also swell. As a result, you may find yourself with fissures, hemorrhoids, and other localized injuries.”
Extended wear won’t loosen your anus
The anus is an incredible thing that’s super efficient at doing its job, which is to contract to hold poop in your rectum and flex when it’s time to let it out.
Not a massive butt plug nor poop can keep it from bouncing back to its OG size.
If you’re sure you want to extend your plug sesh despite the potential risks, there are steps you can take to make it safer and less ouchy for your tushy.
Extended wear ≠ sleeping with it in
Sleeping with a butt plug inside you — even for just a catnap — is NOT a good idea. If you’re asleep, you could miss warning signs of a problem, like discomfort or bleeding.
If you’re going to be inviting anything into your tight back quarters for an extended stay, there are a few things to look for.
Size, shape, and material matter, but so does choosing a toy you’re familiar with, explains Daniel Saynt, founder and chief conspirator of the New Society for Wellness, a sex- and cannabis-friendly members-only club in New York City.
If you’ve got a butt plug that you already love and find comfortable, that could be a good start. If not, start from scratch and spend some time getting to know each other before your extended rendezvous.
Saynt recommends choosing softer materials over hard ones, like metal, if you want to prevent discomfort and bleeding. “A silicon version will be softer on your backside and allow for extended play,” says Saynt.
Size and shape are important, too. While you definitely don’t want to go with a massive plug that can get uncomfortable real fast even for an experienced anal toy connoisseur, too small a plug can be problematic, too.
“I’d stay away from any that have a smaller plug, as this may get lost in your anus after a day of running errands or heading to work,” says Saynt.
Yep, when it comes to your butt, a toy can get away from you and end up too high in your rectum to reach. This is rare, but possible, which is why the shape of an anal toy is crucial.
Butt plugs have a smaller tip and wider base to keep a toy from penetrating too far. Choosing one with a T-bar is recommended for extended wear, especially if you’re going on about your business and moving around a lot.
Not sure what to buy? Saynt loves B-Vibe’s collection of safe, silicone-based plugs.
“I prefer weighted butt plugs, and their Snug Plug is great for extended play. I also love their Novice Plug, which is app-controlled and allows your partner to get in on the action,” says Saynt.
“If you’re looking for a little more length, Tom’s of Finland Rimmers are great for keeping in and ensuring maximum stimulation throughout the day.”
Lube is nonnegotiable when it comes to butt play. Without it, you can quite literally tear yourself a new one and do some very painful damage to your anus and your rectum — if you can even manage to get it in.
Lube doesn’t just help you get it in, it’ll also help make the butt plug more comfortable as it moves around in there. And it’s gonna move as you move.
You’ll want to lube up your anus and the butt plug for insertion and removal. You’ll also want to lube up throughout the day to avoid irritation.
We’re fans of water-based lube because it’s barrier and toy-friendly, but silicone lube is thicker, slipperier, and longer lasting, making it great for extended butt action.
Just don’t use silicone lube with a silicone toy. Silicone attracts silicone and will make the toy tacky and cause it to degrade, potentially leaving bits of the toy behind.
Need lube? Here are some popular silicone options for riding the B train all day:
- Überlube
- Astroglide X Silicone Liquid
- Pjur Analyse Me!
Prefer water-based? Try one of these:
- MOJO Anal Relaxing Water-based Glide
- JO H2O Anal
- Sliquid H20
Don’t try to be a hero — even the strongest and most skilled bottom needs a break!
Along with taking regular breaks to re-lube, Saynt recommends checking yourself throughout the day to make sure there’s no bleeding or leakage.
If you’re bleeding or in pain, take it out ASAP and leave it out. The same goes for signs of irritation like inflammation or redness.
Taking it out when you use the washroom is also recommended. The last thing you want is to get pee on the base or — eek! — accidentally push it out into the toilet.
When wearing a butt plug all day, function and discretion need to be your primary ‘fit considerations, starting with your underwear.
“Make sure to wear underwear that helps keep the plug in place,” warns Saynt. “The last thing you want is for your booty bumper to hit the floor while at an important meeting or out to lunch.”
Since leakage is a possibility — two words: period underwear. You’re welcome. And yes, as long as you choose your size accordingly, anyone can wear them — no uterus needed.
A thin period pad can work, too, and might also help camouflage the base bulge.
You might also consider packing some body-safe wipes so you can clean up lube and leakage on the fly. Royal Individually Wrapped Wipes are handy and easily tuck into your pocket or bag.
“A full day of anal stimulation can result in your muscles being tired or constrained after removal,” says Saynt. “Be sure to give yourself some aftercare at the end of the day.”
Soak in a warm Epsom salt bath to soothe your overworked derrière and relax those muscles and give your booty a break from butt play for a few days.
Hightail it to a doctor or other healthcare professional if you have:
- trouble removing the butt plug
- significant or continuous bleeding or pain
- signs of infection, like worsening pain, swelling, or rectal discharge
- abdominal pain, which could indicate rectal perforation (which is super rare, BTW)
Wearing a butt plug all day or even for an extended period isn’t recommended and can have some painful consequences.
That said, we get that some people are happy to take the risk in the name of some prolonged pleasure. If you’re one of them, take the necessary precautions to keep you (and your booty!) safe.
Adrienne Santos-Longhurst is a Canada-based freelance writer and author who has written extensively on all things health and lifestyle for more than a decade. When she’s not holed-up in her writing shed researching an article or off interviewing health professionals, she can be found frolicking around her beach town with husband and dogs in tow or splashing about the lake trying to master the stand-up paddle board.
Last medically reviewed on September 22, 2021
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